Yesterday’s post was my 800th. Apparently living with mental illness for close to two decades has given me a lot to say on the subject.
And now, looking back over the last 800 (and 1) posts (if you include this one), some might wonder how I still have things to say. And the fact is my demons aren’t going anywhere, the stigma that keeps people from opening up isn’t going anywhere, so why would I stop?
Recovery from mental illness is a non-linear journey that never really ends. Sure, you get to a good place, which is where I have generally been for the last few years, but it still takes constant work and adjustments to maintain that mental wellness. And just when you think you have it all figured out, your damn mental illness goes and changes things on you.
Because that is what happens. The self-care routines that helped me early on in my recovery have changed as my demons have evolved. It is exhausting. One of the reasons for these last 800 (and 1) posts is to let others know they aren’t alone if they are fighting similar battles. However, another very important reason is to stay accountable in my recovery.
The story of mental illness is one that a lifetime’s worth of words and posts could not completely describe. The darkness of depression, the awfulness of constant anxiety, the scary surrealism of schizophrenia, and the darkness of all the other mental illnesses whisper lies constantly. And 800 (and 1) posts later, I am still pushing back against those lies and the stigmas that hide them.
And I thank you for being a part of the journey.