Guys and girls, I went to the store today! And is it ever a sign of the times that leaving the house is a newsworthy event. Yet, going out in the world always caused me a twinge of anxiety. Not enough to keep me from going out before all this happened per se, but enough that I was always aware of my anxiety going out and was perfectly happy to stay in instead if that was an option. Oh, and I’ve also always been a bit of a germaphobe. Again, not enough to avoid any experiences, but enough that I get extra anxiety at potential exposures. So extra hand washing and staying inside, it is like my mental illness has been preparing me for this pandemic for years!
Yet like I said, I had to go out to the grocery store today. And it is a new take on the familiar twinge of social anxiety. Is that person closer than six feet? Why aren’t they wearing a mask? It is exhausting.
Then the social anxiety follows me home. Disinfecting everything, taking all the clothing I wore off and dumping them straight into the washer, showering, disinfecting my car. Only then can I relax.
It is exhausting, but I recognize that it is better safe than sorry. And I know that just like with my mental illness, it will get better. There will be a light at the end of the tunnel. And we will all be so happy to go out when we get to that point. Until then, please stay inside and stay healthy.
And as always thanks for reading everyone. Have a safe and healthy weekend.
P.S. why does my face always get extra itchy when I masked up and out in the world and unable to touch my face?
The Dark Tales Project 